Coming from a place of personal experience.
Walking away from a situation or relationship can be a difficult decision, but sometimes it is necessary in order to prioritize your well-being and happiness.
So I am someone who has a history of holding on to things for the longest time. To an extent that it started manifesting in my physical and mental health.
With a past relationship, it got so fucked up that I became a recluse not being able to socialize.
With work, I started ignoring my successes and ended up making what I was building my life, literally living it on every level of my being.
It took a collapse for me to figure out this shit is just not worth it.
The tricky thing for me and my narcissistic personality was not being able to accept failure and figuring out when it was the right time to walk away I wish I could've walked away because I somehow ended up shutting out tremendous opportunities while holding out on what I thought was worth holding on to.
But how do you know when it’s the right time to walk away?
Here are signs I noticed in myself.
- I always felt drained and exhausted: I used to feel like I was dragging my feet around. I used to sometimes feel like I wouldn’t get through the day. If being around a person or in a particular situation leaves you feeling like that or I’ll go on a limb and say 25% of that, it may be time to step back and reevaluate your involvement.
- Your values and needs are not being met: I realized I deserved a lot more respect than what I was giving myself. If the people or circumstances in your life do not align with your core values and needs, it may be time to move on. I realized the work I was doing was not meant for me as per my capabilities, without being arrogant, it was work that I found pointless and unintelligent, being done just for the sake of raking in the moolah.
- You’re not growing or being fulfilled: Things got monotonous and mundane. I realized the only constant is evolution, and that was not happening on the relationship front or the work front. Literally felt like a neanderthal. If you’re not growing or being challenged in a positive way in your relationships or circumstances, it may be time to seek new opportunities for growth and fulfillment.
- You feel constantly criticized or belittled: If you’re in a situation where you’re constantly being criticized or belittled, it can take a toll on your self-esteem and well-being. In this case, it may be time to distance yourself from the situation or person. This happened to me in my relationship, I didn’t notice it at first, but when I did I realized it was the subtle references to how I am as a person that compounded into playing on my mental health. Relationships are meant to be positive where companionship matters more, I started feeling like it was a chore where I used to find things like date nights and drinks and movies to distract us.
- You’ve tried to make changes, but they’re not happening: I know I kept looking for things that I would try to improve the situation I was in, and I spent an awesome amount of time and money trying to fix it. But nothing fucking worked, and that is when I looked inward and realized the problem with both was me, I had grown out of my relationship. I had grown out of doing any work for money and had grown into actually being the guy I was supposed to be. And I was being wasted doing what I was doing.
It’s important to remember that walking away doesn’t mean giving up or being a failure. It’s a brave and empowering decision to prioritize your well-being and happiness.
It is now as I write this post, I realized walking away from those situations was the best thing I could do for myself.
Here is what happened when I did this:
- I felt happier: I know it sounds cliche, but the moment I addressed those issues, instantly a weight got lifted off my shoulders and I felt a lot lighter. I had not known I would feel that way.
- I had more time to address opportunities: I literally did not see it earlier, I was so involved with those negative toxic situations, I was ignoring all the good I was surrounded by. It might sound paradoxical, but it is advocated to stay in the present, but being able to identify that my present circumstances were not serving me is what I am speaking about.
- I rediscovered myself: I rediscovered the ballsy guy who started his own company at 18 and built it into one of the most successful and well-known event companies in Mumbai. Someone who had guts enough to admit where and how he fucked up and rectify that. That guy was asleep for a while. I became my same aggressive self who liked healthy debate and always called a spade a spade without worrying about what others would think because my expression of those things now was coming from a place of love and not of lack.
- I restarted, but wiser: I was a dumb kid once, who through brute force got to where he was. This time, when I let go of my co-directors and went off on my own, I walked away with 18 years of experience running Pegasus, and it took me all of two years into building Ting Tong, my agency into a powerhouse company, packed with disruptive concepts that catapult brands and events.
If something is not serving you, dig deep and rediscover the person you really are. You deserve more, find your guts and be yourself, without really giving a fuck about others. The world today is all you do you and tIll do me. Nobody will bat an eyelid.
If it helps, seek therapy or a friend to talk to, you do not necessarily need to figure this out yourself.
I know I did, but that is only because I am not an available person, I cannot open up easily.
In conclusion, walking away from a situation or relationship can be a difficult decision, but it can also be necessary for personal growth and well-being. By recognizing the signs that it may be time to move on and seeking support, you can make the best decision for yourself and your future.